There’s an Uncle Joe and Aunt Martha in every single town
in the United States. Aunt Martha is the loving wife. Uncle Joe is the
hardworking middle class guy with a lot of great ideas, many of which are in
his garage and basement in various stages of assembly. The day finally comes
when Uncle Joe breathlessly tells Aunt Martha that he has an invention that
will “revolutionize the industry!!!” Being the supportive wife that she is,
Aunt Martha succumbs to Uncle Joe’s excitement. In fact, friends and family are
also excited…this is it! Uncle Joe has finally come up with “The Home Run”…and everyone
fastens their seat belts because this ride is all downhill into the pot of gold,
and the ride is being “taken” at very high speed.
The operative word in the preceding paragraph is “taken,”
and the misunderstanding is who or what ultimately gets the “pot of gold.” No,
this isn’t a short story about the big, bad, company stealing Uncle Joe’s great
idea and going on to make millions. This is about the much more common
occurrence of Uncle Joe and Aunt Martha going down the 1-800-INVENT-IT path,
spending thousands of dollars to ultimately get bubkiss…and the hundreds of
so-called “professionals” who are only too happy to offer their services in the
process. It is important to state here that companies which are in the serious
business of developing technologies and products for any given marketplace
generally do not use 1-800-U-CAN-GIT-A-PATENT firms, because most of these firms are not credible, they do not specialize in
patent law, they are not “well-connected in the industry,” and the work product
that they most often produce has little or no real value. But they are
slick advertisers, they do know how to appeal to the
public-at-large, and they will take your money…to add to their
growing pot of gold.
The United States Patent and Trademark Office (USPTO) has
estimated that only 3% of all issued patents ever produce any revenue for the
assignee (the patent’s owner.) There are countless reasons for this, one being
that an issued patent alone is not in itself an indication that what is being
protected is necessarily a good idea. Other reasons include the invention being
too difficult or expensive to manufacture, while many more simply have no
demonstrable market or a market that is not easily penetrated.
If you’re Uncle Joe: Do your homework and do the hard
work before jumping off the high dive.
If you’re Aunt Martha: Force
Uncle Joe to read Part #2. If he
refuses, empty the pool of water, fill it with broken glass, make sure his life
insurance premiums are up-to-date, and then tell him to go ahead and jump…
